On behalf of Stephen Bedor of Law Office of Stephen J. Bedor posted in child custody on Wednesday, August 15, 2018. 

The teen years are hard enough without life-changing events, but when you find out that your parents are divorcing, that can be devastating. As a parent of a teen, you need to find an appropriate way to discuss the divorce and to help your teen understand your choices.

One of the issues with divorce when you have a teen is that they are likely to have their own opinion about the divorce and to vocalize them. You need to be prepared as a parent to listen and respond in a way that helps your situation and protects your relationship with your child.

Here are three tips for helping your teen understand and adjust to your divorce:

1. Know that your teen needs to vent

This might involve some slammed doors or angry stares, but you have to let your child express themselves. If the conversation becomes heated, then give your child a chance to cool off before approaching the topic again.

2. Ask your teen questions

You should ask your teen how they feel about the divorce. Some parents may find that their teens welcome it because it means a chance in the circumstances at home. Others may find that their teens are concerned about divorce and where they'll live or what they'll have to do once their parents split up.

3. Remind your teen that you love them

Finally, remind your teen that this doesn't have anything to do with them. Your choice to divorce your spouse is about your relationship, not about your child. Reaffirm that your child's best interests are uppermost in your and your co-parent's mind.

As you go through the divorce, your Oregon family law attorney can help you work toward the support, custody and parenting time goals you're seeking.